“I don’t want to be resilient anymore. I just want things to feel a bit softer.”

Life can feel heavy. This blog was created not as an escape from the world, but as a recognition of the beauty that surrounds us in our ordinary, everyday lives. I think most of us would agree that we all carry emotional weight to varying degrees, and many of us would feel immense relief in a world that feels lighter than the one we know.

I’m Paul. I live with a rare genetic metabolic disease called Phenylketonuria, which can affect cognitive executive functioning and the nervous system. As a result, life has often demanded a high level of emotional and psychological resilience — particularly as my condition was unmanaged between the ages of 11 and 28.

Now, at 42, after 14 years of good control, I have come to know myself on a deeper level than ever before. Yet, with the emotional weight of years gone by, combined with my sister’s recent passing, I now feel a profound and undeniable need for peace.

I can no longer accept situations and environments that demand constant resilience. Instead, I want harmony. I need things to feel softer than ever before — maybe you do too.

Mind and Matter is a project through which I will regularly look for beauty in everyday life, finding peace in a softer world for myself and for those who read along, through written meditations and quiet observations.

Thanks for reading.

Paul